For years, I ran from this.

Not from the gifts, those were never in question. I ran from what having them would mean. Being seen. Being known as that person. The one who talks to the dead, who feels what others can't explain, who stands in front of a room and says things she has no business knowing.

I wanted none of it.

And that's the part nobody tells you about mediumship: Spirit doesn't choose the people chasing a stage. It chooses the ones who'd rather disappear. Because the message was never supposed to be about us. If we wanted the fame, we'd get in the way of what's trying to come through.

So I hid. For many years I told myself I could do this quietly, for a few people, behind closed doors, no website, no audience, no risk. Small enough that I could still pretend it wasn't really happening.

But joy doesn't stay quiet. That's what I didn't expect.

Every time I sat with someone and watched a message land, watched their face change because their mother, their child, their old friend had just reached them one more time, something in me came alive that nothing else touches. Not the healing work, not the teaching, not even Reiki itself, as much as I love it. This was different. This was mine in a way I couldn't explain and eventually couldn't ignore.

The more I did it, the more it asked of me. Not louder but clearer. Every session was proof I couldn't keep living a life split in two: one foot in spirituality, one foot pretending I could still fit into a smaller, safer story.

I can't do that anymore. I've tried, and it always brings me back here.

So I'm done making myself small to avoid being seen. The joy of this work is the whole point, it's not a side effect I have to justify. It's nourishing something in me that nothing else reaches, and the more people it helps, the more it heals in me too.

If Spirit wanted someone comfortable with the spotlight, it wouldn't have chosen me. It chose someone willing to walk into it anyway, for the sake of what comes through.

I'm walking in, and I'm not walking in alone.

This is exactly why I built From Reiki to Mediumship. Because I know I'm not the only one who's felt this pull and pushed it back down. If you're a Reiki practitioner who's noticed your Reiji-hō opening into something more, sensing presences, receiving impressions that aren't quite "energy" anymore, feeling that quiet nudge toward spirit communication, this course is the bridge I am handed today. Eight weeks, one Clair at a time, moving from sensing to communicating, at your own pace, with the same reverence I had to learn the hard way.

You don't have to want the fame. You just have to stop running.

Cindy x